NONE OF YOUR FRIENDS BOUGHT THIS!

June 25th, 2012 by CASUDI


Do we lose our Identity with too much sharing? If I buy, listen, eat, and dress like all my friends, will I become just like them? Do I really want to? What about me?

Will the real CASUDI sit down?

Everyone is buzzing that “sharing” is the hot thing; including Cecile Poignant, guest on a recent fascinating #ideachat twitter chat, which highlighted the “Sharable Economy” as the main long-term trend which will change the world.

Cecile went as far as to call it “good sharing”, when I said something negative about ‘over-sharing’.

This put me in mind of the Romans, who built their paved roads to expand trade and share. They were “good” roads resulting in increased commerce (lots more sharing;-); then, quite predictably, the bad guys (bandits) took advantage of these fabulous roads allowing easy access to Rome, and, well, you know what happened next.

Will sharing have its bandits? Will our identities be shared so much that we will lose our identity, individuality, and whatever makes us unique and different….because we will have shared so much we will become/do/have just like everyone else?

Everyday I am getting more bored with hearing the tiniest little detail of what my friends do…..with the implication that I should do the same. In fact I don’t give a rat’s **s what all the others are doing…. I want what I want, which may be quite different than what my friends and acquaintances want …. I’m into unique, different, one-of-a kind…Amazon gets it dead wrong when they try to lure me with “those who bought this also bought that”….. so am I very different in wanting and being different? Guess I’m not seeking peer approval here…….!

Is this the “living end” or the “new normal?”  I was buying some designer frames recently at Ottica Bellevue, and heard about a customer who had “shared” his image to 50 FB friends for their opinion, asking “what should I buy?” (Darn! Where did that self-confidence go?)

On the other hand I knew just what I liked, and I bought it. Of course I asked the ‘Art God’ for his expert opinion, but it wasn’t a deciding factor; I was just massaging his ego ;-)

We all know the dangers of casually sharing your location; not at home = house empty, come on in… Sharing information about your children, teenagers sharing with strangers…you name it, lots of potentially ‘scary sharing’ out there…

Will the pendulum soon swing to the other side…? This post on the MENG blog by Drew McLellan definitely came to an interesting  conclusion. I’ve been thinking about it for sometime in relation to the predictability of sharing: Is Being Random a Trend Worth Watching?

I have to admit there is great convenience in the convenience of sharing music/books/reviews. Though I have always preferred to create my own music and book lists, I of course don’t hesitate to take an occasional excellent recommendation or two from a friend ;-) I guess after all I am falling into the “Share” trap

Before all this “obsessive” sharing reared it’s head, I looked at the universe in a simple (overly simple?) way ~ There were trend-setters, style makers & trend/style-followers. Most of my life I have been asked which books I am reading, what music do I like, where do I shop…..but fortunately (so far) no one is sharing my red-hat! My avatar is still unique..

So will the “serendipity” app end up over taking the “sharable economy app”? Will there be an app to tell you that NONE OF YOUR FRIENDS BOUGHT THIS?

Maybe I don’t get it? If so please share with me….. where I am missing the point?

@CASUDI Designing Success.

 

10 Responses to “NONE OF YOUR FRIENDS BOUGHT THIS!”

  1. Bruce Sallan (@BruceSallan) Says:

    I like to share…so, what’d you have for lunch today, Caroline?

  2. CASUDI (Caroline Di Diego) Says:

    Bruce, you cant really be interested in this?

  3. Janet Callaway Says:

    Caroline, aloha. So appreciated your comments on the road built by the Romans. They did indeed work both ways–good and bad.

    In terms of sharing, I never cease to be amazed at what people share and, more often than not, wonder WHY? or WHO CARES?

    While I do like receiving recommendations on books, restaurants, etc. I use that information merely as a part of my own decision making process.

    Since no one else is living my life, why would I want them to decide what books I read of picture frames I select?

    We celebrate the “different” so why on earth would I want to be the “same” as everyone else?

    Needless to say, Caroline, I am in 100% agreement with you on this topic. PLUS, seeing the multiple pictures of you in your red cape brought a huge smile to my face.

    Thanks, Caroline, for being uniquely YOU and proud of it. Aloha. Janet

  4. CASUDI (Caroline Di Diego) Says:

    Janet, I am not surprised we are in total agreement here. However, an interesting discussion on twitter is happening now with @cecilepoignant who says ~ To Me Sharing is not Copying. No one looses identity ~ #Share your car, flat, knowledge. It ‘ll Make you Smarter :)~ I do get her point, but still this “obsessive” sharing is what we really object to?

  5. Brian Driggs Says:

    I think Janet touches on the critical piece – why & who cares?

    So much of the sharing these days is of thin value. It’s a fleeting acknowledgment of something meant to be passed along in the hope that it might prove us in some way helpful (or at least novel) to others. Not to say it’s all vacuous, but it’s as though the things so commonly shared are of so little value we’re willing to simply give them away without a second thought.

    If only we were so willing to share our time, or abilities, or resources with the world at large!

    The one thing I aspire to do when I share anything is to preface it with WHY I’m sharing. I probably fail at this more than I succeed, but it feels right. The stream is getting noisy and I’d like to tune much of the noise out, but would it still be noise if I knew why it was being shared?

    Enjoying your posts lately, Casudi. :)

  6. Nick Kellet Says:

    Smart thinking.

    Buck the trend.

    Chrome has this – It’s call Incognito. You see the web with no preferences.

    It’s odd to think how much all this input distorts our opinions.

    of source the other value of the “Not Bought by my friends yet app” is it doesnt just apply to purchases.

    Not shared yet works just as well.

    We dance a fine like between individuality and conformity.

    And I love your roads and bandits metaphor. Very cool

  7. CASUDI (Caroline Di Diego) Says:

    Brain, I really think we all need to review WHY and WHAT we share. Using @bufferapp scheduled tweets works well for me in selecting the best 5 things to share in any given day. Triberr also gives me some really good things to share via the Women Who Rock tribe I am part of. I receive a select number of RSS feed (yes select), which fills out my sharing menu selections. In addition there are things I pick up on twitter and G+, but so often I open a link and it’s “fluff” and so totally not worthwhile.

    Nick, At this point considering the online footprint I have designed, I’m not willing to go incognito. You are so right It’s the balance between doing everything like everyone else and keeping the individual “me”. Glad you like the “bandits” analogy. The internet of this Century has the same significance as the network of roads to Rome did during the first Century BC/AD and we have our 21C bandits for sure. What can be used for positive also can be used for negative, and the big question is always how do we keeps the scales tipped in favor of the positive, very much in favor.

    Brian/Nick what do you think about “sharing” this response space? Should I do a response separate to each and every? Brian you will remember that we met on @ConversationAge comments, where she always responded to several together. I kind of like it, however it doesn’t pad the comments numbers, which IMO isn’t all bad. I don’t want to wade through 999 comments or add mine to the end, so lower numbers are better, or are they?

    Brain meet Nick, Nick meet Brian. Brian is there any chance you can make #SOBcon NW at the end of September, both Nick and I all be there?

  8. Brian Driggs Says:

    Thank you for the introduction, Casudi. Having just blown my entire travel and rally car assembly budget for the year on ten days in the old country, I’m afraid I’m Arizona-bound for the remainder of the year.

    The PacNW beckons, and I have “Ride in Perlita Too” written on my bucket list with indelible ink, but with a baby on the way, I need to play it close to home. (And begin to figure out how to bring the world to me if I can’t get out into the world, I might add.)

    Nice to meet you, Nick. I see you’re British-born, Canadian-adopted. I’m of the American-born, British-enamored, Canadian-hopeful variety. The grass may not actually be greener, but the world is too incredible a place to spend it in any one place for long. Home should be a place to spend layovers!

    Sharing the response space is a good idea. As Valeria said years ago, comments aren’t necessarily conversation. I think the only people who add their comment to the posts with more than 50 previous comments are those more interested in the “link love.”

    I’m more interested in building a relationship with the people behind the stories. In that regard, I think the comments serve a place for introductions which lead to more back channel discussions; email, forums, G+, et al.

    Interested to see what y’all think along these lines.

  9. TWICs XXXII Says:

    […] Inclined to Design: None of Your Friends Bought This (06.25.12) The one thing I aspire to do when I share anything is to preface it with WHY I’m sharing. I probably fail at this more than I succeed, but it feels right. The stream is getting noisy and I’d like to tune much of the noise out, but would it still be noise if I knew why it was being shared? […]

  10. nathan granner Says:

    I think the opinion is valid, but what do the big data numbers say? You could actually be steering yourself into a corner…

    Lots of people like the same things, but why not give the science AND the belief in your post. Research it and give me some real data too.

    Thanks for sharing though.

    nathan

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